Saturday, January 24, 2009

try to live alittle -willya?

my haircolor results,,ho-hum

art ,,ineed art i need to do art.

i am scared and depressed deep down, ive had this feeling before,its when i thought i was worthless,then i got over that with help from K, but now i feel worhtlessness again.its kind of scarring me cuz i become so deeply painfully hurt in my soul.
i cannot control it(feeling of worthlessness)
i am not doing some self pity thing either,,,i could care less about me at this point -i just wanna feel secure in my environment and feel like i am loved, and respected....the nerve of me,thinking i could be happy? HA! riiiiiight, nothing has gone Right for me for YEARS now,i am under some kind of jinx,a spell,ive Never had such a hard time just tring to get by and understand just what my purpose here iS? i mean really?
why am i here,,i have no clue.
i hate rheumatoid. i dont feel good.
i do love this lil kit tho.thatsfersher!
~about RA i just read his: Autoimmune diseases are the eighth leading cause of death among women, shortening the average patient's lifespan by fifteen years.

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