Wednesday, May 30, 2007

why are doctors so Fu&^%$ed up in the american medical World??huh??just need an answer pleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeease!!! ===================pissed off -can ya tell? HA-OMG my dr wrote a script for me 2 months ago for darvon Quanity- 100 ---im out of them they are NOW GONE -emergencytime!-
and im in pain and need them just about every day,,so back to story-
i call DR office, YESTERDAY, tell them i need 100 prednison,(cuz he wrote a script for like 30-as if thats gonna do any fucking thing) tell them i need 100 prednisone and 100 darvon JUST LIKE THE LAST TIME OK?OK! she seemd to have understood me,,,riiiiiiiight.
i go (drag my ass to the fuckin pharmacy-oh the pain) then pick up OK = 100 predinisone OK,,and 12 fucking darvon=OMG what r u thinking - do i have to come up there my self and do it you stupid money/time wasting fuckers !!! im so Fucking pissed<>its about the money wasted and the fuckiin effort just to get alittle fuckin relief ,,,daMN! i mean really!
*heres what we see when we look real hard,,,its the "DUMBING DOWN" of Americans and decreasing the level of acceptance.. well im "oldschool" and i cant handle this fucked up attitude from all these people who will accept this dumbing down and go along with it,hell they dont even know its happening reallyQ!--- you know the ones i mean,,,,,the ones that talk on the fuckin cell-phone while crashing into your car,,andthen act like its YOUR fault,,HUH! ,,people are soooo GOD i just cant even belive the idiots tha i enconter as i try to take care of myheath,,shit,,i know more about the disease ow then my OWN rheumatologist!
* OH and also...,,,,everyones a rip- off now - cant trust anyone- god if u have to buy a used car,,get ready to get screwed hard!they wanna steal whatever ya got - and come back for more,,, like they are entitled! HA "entitlements issues" galore!

Thursday, May 24, 2007

ola~ its a rainy thursday morning, ive spent 2 days-tues and wed- trying to get over a slight flare,,i feel a little better this morn, rested but still no energy, im dragging bad! tuesday and wed were swollen and hurt to pick up things and walk on my feet SO THAT MEANS i did NOT pick up my pescription at walmart pharmacy for prednisone -i have a stash untill i can get over there,,i callled them to hold it - they are SO NICE i should pull all my scripts to them,,but its TOO FAR AWAY! soo bad idea/walgreens is a walk away!
its DARK this day,,no sun at all. (i slept most of this day and eve,,,kell had school)

Wednesday, May 23, 2007

<-appears that im doing OK right? right!-welll- this was sunday,,it was a good day,,kelly and i had energy and did alot-then monday i went (by myself) over to don and nancys to help herfor awhile,,after some time i realized ohno,,and ive been ina flare ever since,LOL-- (trying to do a good deed for don and nancy) painting the bathroom-which has turned int a living nightmare BTW)
omg i have been away for soo long,, well time flys when ya sleeep all the dang time!!!!!(smile)

Wednesday, May 09, 2007

today im ina flare.

i felt it yesterday..........................

but was soo wired from a " prednisone buildup "ive been taking 20mg now and im used to it now now my body wants more more more, and i will not give it more more more,,i hate prednisone,,it may be saving me but the side effeects suck,,i hate feeling so wired on it,,its like speed and a bad trip all together,i must go sleep now*i just woke up and have to go back to bed, i feel so sick and tired now,my hands and feet are throbbing with pain(may be because i cleaned the basement yesterday,,we flooded down there and i had to save stuff,,bring it all up andthen i cleaned a spoiled floor --this may be why the flare..worked too hard?

didnt seem like it yesterday,my body is now a whimp!
hands have pacmans
feet have pacmans
im so tired i can barely do this
my left hip hurts sobad i have to take 420 and darvon now!!!! i cant wait at all.
im to go get my oxy from my dr office today -if i can drive -no way right now tho i cant just cant ...m u s t... sl e e e e p

Tuesday, May 08, 2007

we LOVE dis Kat!booboomiester.
i see my hands look rufff i was upset when i got into my thoughts,,i just took a klonipin and got over it,,what-ever i was thinkin 'bout
i became soo depressed,,OMG i wish i could erase memories,,please! they hurt so bad,,
why hasnt my dad written back to me?-first outloud mention of this ... he must just be buzy buzy buzy....tear-my heart hurts now-- gotta go

Sunday, May 06, 2007

me and Kell over at marys about 5 years ago. **CLICK on pic to see largeview

hands and feet on today.sunday.
*very ra today-not enough sleep.
Its sunday,,we r sitting at the computers,,as we have done for over five years now,,,our long lived tradition~computers~on a sunday morning ...or any other time -we live in front of these Computers,,and watching what is going in the world, and listen to a mp3 or two....
  1. Kelly found some interesting things to search for on YOUTUBE,,(addicted)whitetrash on cops...insane lady on cops,,OMG -we spent hours watching C.O.P.S. and all kinds of funni clips of insane freaks that really do drive cars and just walk the streets out there....
  2. god ppl are soo strange
  3. if anyone reads this,,(i think noone reads this BUT if anyone ois reading this PLEASE search you tube for this,,,
  4. Stupid Cop gets caught on train tracks
  5. Cops S14E35 crazy woman
  6. heres a general search for crazy ladies on cops,,pulls alot to watxch and its most interseting
  8. <- not sure about numbers,,they wont delete and they dont bother me so im leaving them

Friday, May 04, 2007

close up og my (R) hand in 1999=ppl said i had strong hands. i see the diffference,,notice my normal wrist - now my wristbones pop up,,,they are maleformed!
awwwww i just adore this picture of my dad and sister ...this is a scanned picture i just scanned today .
i sooo remember this day,,1999-we were so young and healthy
me my store assistant manager kristy tew,,(i wonder where she is now) i JUST LOVED MY KRISTI -she really was the only one i could trust backthen,,i loved her. and Rhonda,,shes who started me in retail managment,,she recomended me for "bebe",,(blush--me? wow OK!-shure Id be glad to run one of the HOTTEST stores in TULSA )
my lil sister looks so pretty ini this picture tha i HAD to post this one! i love my sister! shes really something,,strong strong girl and so creative and beautiful.
[confession:she was always my idol,,i always wanted to be like her]

Thursday, May 03, 2007

its a rainy chilly thursday, this morning, we noticed our beloved booboomeister wasnt around,,everymorning he sits in the hallway watching us do our human things,,but he wasnt there this morning,WE PANICED and frantically looked everywhereIN,,nothing,OMG freakout,,i had to take a full kolinipin to stop from what i thought was gonna be NO MORE BOOBOO- and that would set off a RA flare from HELL! we geared up fast and ran outside in the rain calling & calling, boooobooooo where r u booooboooooooo i was so frantic,,my heart was beating outta my chest ,,i was freaking out icame back in to see again about boo on the inside??nope,,ran back OUTSIDE..kellys in the driveway and throws her arm back with a SHHHHHHHH..i hear him,, and LOW AND BEHOLD out from under the car in the garage,,OMG-BOOBOO he was scared an so dirty,,and he would not come,,i called boooo come booboooooo, he wanted to, but was scared to comeout from under the car,,i just REACHED under and pulled the lil..$#%^&* out and held him so tight ///// we rushed him in, let him down, and dropped to the floor,,me with a tears! saying thank u lord thank u lord jesus!!! the booboo is here now and IM SO glad - now because of the adrenilin and rush of it all- this morning,,i am SO TIRED,,gotta go laydown,,i felt RA comming when got upset and scared running all over yelling for my lil boo ...stress pushes it into action.
no doubt
pm post, kell's at school taking her final in algebra,,,can u belive it,no more math!we r gonna celebrate
im feeling ok tonite -Kellys right,she told me i really really really should take naps during the day just a few hours,,im like,NO! im not a child,,but guess what,,i took a nap today and yesterday and day before,,and she is right ----does seem to make me feel better in the PM.
I go to bed at about 9.00 pm and get up every morn at 6.00am so thats long day in the life of a ra'er i do need to nap,.,i did 1.5 today,,it soooo hard to wake up and go thru the little ra feeling after i wake up at anytime.... i have been extra sensitive or depressed ? lately,,dunno why,,i think its cuz i want to go back to work so badly,,its not gonna happen tho,, not a fulltime job
BUT i have some ideas now with copy VHS onto a DVD for ppl,for money?? sounds good- i just need a small TV and i can do it,,i have the product from patrick,,he sent it via mail,,i was like,OMG what a GIFT! soo,, i see potential there and need to get ahold of a TV/monitor soon.