Monday, October 02, 2006

i went to patsy's with kellbell yesterday-and REALLLLLLY over did it,, i worked with my hands -i had them wrapped in duct tape over wrists-knuckles and thumb knuckle were wrapped 4 protection, BUT i stayedWAY too long and worked way too hard, that i had gone COMPLETLY offf any type of pain meds,,,, and was finished for the day,i accidently hit a hornets nest with a broom and stirred them UP to chase me ,, its middle of the nite im waiting for these pills to kick 4.20rightnow,, so i am painfully typing thi s W/2 or 3 fingers only..back 2 story=
i ran sooo damn fast,,all i saw were those big black bees/wasps EW!!! comming after me,!!!
i was able to outrun them, and realize my right hip now is screwed up ,,i cant pull up my leg for the step..ohno,,cant walk...(right hip had Cortisone Injection)
i stopped "so-called"working and hungout at the pool soaking my hands and feet in icy COLD water untill we could get outta there kelly had to seed and fertilize
and come home.. we ate, showered and I went to bed i was in serous pain and it was hard to wait for the oxy and darvon to kick in, i fell asleep,,deep sleeep.. but bad dreams woke me up,,so im here NOW 12.30 -1.00 am and i have a harsh case of Anxiety and panic attack now, im having a hard time typing this because my hands are still hurt/i am now taking (2) 65 ml of darvon to kill this pain in my hands/feet and right hip,i messed it up from rumnning soo fast yesterday,,im gonna be spending tomarrow -MONDAY- down,,"as-in" unable to deliver any kinda payload,gives me time to catch up computer stuff (like read send emails and look for my next art project.
** NOTE this would be th1st time in LONG time i left home w/o my camera,,,weird day yesterday was.......... Daily Overview for October 01, 2006 SUNDAYS horoscope-Quickie:Approach today with caution. Look for the signs that will tell you what to do.
in retro does this apply ? i was extemly depressed yesterday- worked @ patsys to keep myself occupied mentally & physically
i felt like i was walking a thin line -as in-"just go OFF at anymoment" but i refrained from any urge.
i felt EXTREMLY self conscious and even when i was alone duringthe day i felt like i was being watched. i teared up when i thought about vickey arnold and she just threw my things away knowing--- she KNEW the WHOLE TIME i was comming to get my things....
why r people so mean? i could never,,,intentionally hurt or sabotage anyone ,, its just not in me, to "think-like-that" omg im having suchj a major panic attack now i gota a go,fornow



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