Friday, December 29, 2006


late friday nite, its raining and has been for hours now. (weird weather)

i saw something alarming in the headlines ,im sure its the end,it has to be,,

LOOK/read...
Massive ice shelf collapses into sea
(Dec 29, 2006)
A giant ice shelf the size of 11,000 football fields has snapped free from Canada's Arctic, leaving a trail of icy boulders floating in its wake.
The mass of ice broke clear from the coast of Ellesmere Island, about 800 kilometres south of the North Pole.
Warwick Vincent of Laval University, who studies Arctic conditions, travelled to the newly formed ice island and couldn't believe what he saw.
"It was extraordinary,'' Vincent said yesterday, adding that in 10 years of working in the region he has never seen such a dramatic loss of sea ice.
"This is a piece of Canadian geography that no longer exists.''
The collapse was so powerful that earthquake monitors 250 kilometres away picked up tremors from it.
Scientists say it is the largest event of its kind in 30 years and point their fingers at climate change as a major contributing factor.
"We think this incident is consistent with global climate change,'' Vincent said, adding that the remaining ice shelves are 90 per cent smaller than when they were first discovered in 1906.
"We aren't able to connect all of the dots . . . but unusually warm temperatures definitely played a major role.''
The ice shelf actually broke up 16 months ago, but no one witnessed the dramatic event.
Laurie Weir, who monitors ice conditions for the Canadian Ice Service, was poring over satellite images when she noticed that the shelf had split and separated.
Weir notified Luke Copland, head of the new global ice lab at the University of Ottawa, who initiated an effort to find out what happened.
Using U.S. and Canadian satellite images, as well as data from seismic monitors, Copland discovered that the ice shelf collapsed in the early afternoon of Aug. 13, 2005.
"These ice shelves can break up really quickly, perhaps more quickly than we thought they could do in the past,'' he said.
"Within an hour we could see this entire ice chunk just disconnect and float away.''
Within days, the floating ice shelf had drifted a few kilometres offshore. It travelled west for 50 kilometres until it finally froze into the sea ice in the early winter.
Derek Mueller, a polar researcher with Vincent's team, saw that Ellesmere's Ward Hunt Ice Shelf had cracked in half in 2002. He also saw that sea ice, which creates a buffer zone around ice shelves, was approaching lower and lower levels.
"These ice shelves get weaker and weaker as the temperature rises,'' he said. "And the summer of 2005 had a combination of high temperatures and strong winds that probably blew the sea ice away, making this ice shelf much more vulnerable.''
The Ayles Ice Shelf, roughly 66 square kilometres in area, was one of six major ice shelves remaining in Canada's Arctic.
They are packed with ancient ice that dates back over 3000 years, and scientists like Vincent treat their loss as a sign that the global climate is crossing an unprecedented threshold.
"We're seeing the tragic loss of unique features of the Canadian landscape,'' he said.
"There are microscopic organisms and entire ecosystems associated with this ice, so we're losing a part of Canada's natural richness.''
Meanwhile, the spring thaw may bring another concern as the warming temperatures could release the ice shelf from its Arctic grip.
Prevailing winds could then send the ice island southwards, deep into the Beaufort Sea.
"Over the next few years this ice island could drift into populated shipping routes,'' Weir said.
"There's significant oil and gas development in this region as well, so we'll have to keep monitoring its location over the next few years.''

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this year is almost over, i am feeling slightly better- i have been testing myself to see where i fall in endurance. I see a PATTERN> if i get up at 6.00 am,,then by 6.00pm im dead tired, and im thru.

*this is even if i have done nothing ..(like messing around back here in the computer-room) means nothing.*

Thursday, December 28, 2006

we spent christmas with this group ..( joys family who we like very much.)

omg its been forever,,because ive not been feeling very comfortable in my own skin lately .
i mean i have "the blues" and have no energy and christmas wore me out to visit people.
*we had no money so we had basicly no christams,,BUT we accept the fact that we CAN PAY OUR BILLS, so thats been dubbed "our christmasGift" and we r thankfull for it!
december ends with us NOT kicked out of our home ,,and i have one more month of insurance,,
so,,, in all its been a stresssfull ride,,probably why i cant get better when im always friggen worried about the next bill and dollar,,GOD its enuf to RA anyone!

............NOW we must begin to worrie about JANUARY2007..........................

Saturday, December 16, 2006

me 2day dec 16th and its 70 degrees- cant complain!
me in 2001-2002...............

slight change huh?


saturday,,things seem to be stable 4 now- kellys gone thru a whole week at her new EXELLENT job,,working down town wihtthe big-wigs,,she fits right in and im sooo happy....ive been hurting bad with ra,,my hands, hips and feet are real sensitive ,,ive been testing my self to see if i can go back to work,,like i stayed up and going from 6.00 am do lite work around house call people deal with cutting off certin luxuries tat are not justified for now-by thursday i was in full flair and slept alllllday,,i felt so guilty for sleeping i never give me permission to be sick or not up to par,,why am i so mean to me,,???


in this picture,,im freeezing cuz im reeeeeeaaall tired,,but WOW my hair,,its been over twenty years..that ive had this long of hair..its freakin me ,,


my hands hurt now,,so im off the keyboard now,




Thursday, December 14, 2006




dec 14th and kellys at school,,im tired and board,,i do feel somewhat more hopeful today,im not sure if its because i slept hard last nite for the first time in quite some time,,i do feel better tho, i have to remember how almost close to the edge i was and recall how it all goes back in place, and people just deal with whatever they get .. its like this,,ive been with ra for some time,and tried all the cures and medicines and still not better,,in fact im worst,, depression doesnt help either/ i miss social activity like WORK,,.,,god i miss working,,it gave me a purpose i should dedicate the next few months on a painting or some kind of artistic creation to express how i feel.

it would be just a black canvas,,bad idea/

sigh..................

i need to just quit all the ra stuff and rest rest rest,,then i can go back to work as soon as i can manage to stay awake and maintain for 40 hours a week,,im in a test now,,and today i failed,i HAD to lay down,, hell,,yesterday i feel asleep accidently,,i did alittle bit of straightening and bam..out like a lite..and i hate to fall asleep during the day,its depressing,i hate to wake up,, ,,i just want to stay awake or sleep forever,,but i cant keep going to sleep then waking up ,,it hurts to wake up .,.

it hurts to eat food too ,,i cant swallow very well im stillloosing the weight because i cant swallow,,

im ina trap or a bAD DREAM

BYE !XOOXXOO


Wednesday, December 13, 2006

i think this is beautiful and its about christmas.......................................................

my ra has been bad in my hips and hands, and the doctor said my knuckels are "spongy" eeewwww, ick

Tuesday, December 12, 2006


things have turned for the worse possibly loosing this house ,,cant go on like thi,,im selling things to compensate,and begging for help from everyone

(i feel like a real looser)

wish someone would just put me out of everyones misery
and another thing noone wants to hear about my litiney of problems / everyone has their own issues to deal with ...wtf is going on with planet earth,,hello,!!! is anyone noticing that this world is falling apart? and no one cares,,whatashame

Sunday, December 10, 2006






not so good past few days,,went to remicade on friday, thats all i can say for now
there will be no xmas here, thats fersure!

Wednesday, December 06, 2006

trying 2 b christmas around here,,kinda hard to do when allll my christmas beautiful things were stolen and ill never be able 2 look at orniments and trees now without totally feeling depressed and like well,,,there goes about 2 grand in things..like all hallmark collection of orniments from uss enterprise starship to my fav = beatles all complete hallmark on stage w/paul in front singing,,damn it damnit,,may those theives die athousand times painfl- for stealing my baby jesus things,, really bothers me to this day,hell,,when it happened i went into somekinda somptin',,i ended up with shingles (ouchy) on me and in the hospitial from the depression of it all happening to me,,, cant belive some one stole my baby jesus things - the nerve

Monday, December 04, 2006







dec 04 2006 tonight i received a package from my dad in minnesota who has been to egypt. Inside i found a bottle of water from the NILE and SAND from where the pyramids are. Also a parchment with akhentatens face,my favorite egyptian, and also egyptian headdress and and actual paice of the BIG pyramid- ths was like incredible stuff i just kept digging out more things and we were like OHH,,OMG!

*lord has truely blessed me now




Friday, December 01, 2006




DEC 1 2006 it snowed!
set a snowfall record and the headlines read:
Tulsa Sets Record For November 30th Snowfall The first winter storm of the year dumped 10-point-4 inches of snow in Tulsa on Thursday thru the night.
Patsy said it was the storm of the century,,,,,???!!!
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NOW WE R SNOWED IN soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo.
the news said please do not go out if u can avoid it,the whole town is at a standstill...EVERYthing is closed.

i feel OK as far as ra goes...i have had some rest & not able to get out and "over.do" myself at whatever i would be doing. my hip (R) is killing me tho,-probably due 2 the damp weather, but i JUST had CORTISONE injections in BOTH hips on november 21st..why r they still killin me?

i was supposed to have a Remicade treatment on thursday Nov30th BUT CANCELED as everyone else had to as well,,*kinda funi how everyone goes crazy when the weather gets wild.