i went into Morton this AM, Kelly helped me get there and organized for it all - papers- prescription info-and after we got there,,,i FORGOT my BLUE CARD i went into panic...they said,"relax-no-problem"so we explained the situation,,the same girl i saw last thursday was working today, she remembered me and made a phone call,and got me,in ,,even tho i really had no appt,,,and they were SO KIND and COMPETENT-
more later -cuz we r drinking a glass of champagne and we r VERY tired and want to chillout 4 now

i just thought of this,,,in all the money we've paid out for RA treatment and doctors offices weve been in,,NEVER EVER ONE TIME have any of the rheumatoloisgists told me anything about this disease or where it seems to be MOST in me,, they have ONLY said "take this medicine and we will see u back in two weeks,," OK,,NEVER has it been told to me things to do,,
never has it been personalized,and why dont they care??i dont think they CARE
* all the nurses seem like drones and the doctors act like if they say ANYthing they will be sued,,likethey r afraid to say any thing, i almost think everyones really turning mean these days..EVERY one is so short fused and ready to kill kill killl,,,,or tazer tazer tazer-LOL,,, really tho,,on myspace, ive written that i think every ones mean today and it may be due to the CHEM TRAILS- i believe this with all my heart,,we r being poisoned,,,,,,,by the chem trails
http://educate-yourself.org/ct/

hi -today is FRIDAY dec 28th and we r celebrating our 7th year (kewl)

i feel OK now- -better then yesterday because i took darvon yesterday for pain but took oxycodine today,,,,and the difference is incredible,,,, dr wiseman released / fired me from his patients based on that ol' "sour apple atthe front desk" well, she has a bad attitude and dumb as a box of rocks-sorry its true tho-anyways,,,im released/fired from him because of her,,(just great),,i called her and told her how i felt about allthis ,,then hung up on her,,ohwell,,,

gods pushing me to a new path,,im scared cuz i dont know whats around the next corner,,im thinkin' " when did i become so afraid of the unknown????",,i used to live in the unknown,,i was raised by my mom and dad with the UNKNOWN === sooo im going with the flow and just take it as it comes,,new doctors with new procedures-new places to go-and new faces and connections,,hoping for the help i need - i have to get the RA under controll,,,im sleeping 16 hours a day,,if i do not sleep for that long,,iget sick,,,very sick,,weak-no appitite and it lasts for about 3-4 days,,i have to sleep for 16 hours or im screwed - weird weird weird,, i cannot increase my prednisone from 20 miligrams daily- because it makes me wired and crazyparinoid and im unable to sleep at all ,,so i have to just stay w/ 20.mg and find something else,,enbril is alll ive NOT tried,,its all thats left,,remicade just about killed me with ther injections of metho- i cant do that again- i just cant

i dont feel well today..its THURSDAY, and i really feel like i cant lift a thing,,the kitchen needs to be vacuumed and all dusting everything needs to be done,but i cant, and i cry ,because im not good at NOT being able to do anything at all even tho i've had RA now for about 5 years and its only getting worse = so i went to MORTON clinic today ..i did not want to,,but had to because IM OUT of prednisone ====== frigin doctor wiseman cut me off..i calledthem and toldthem that its probably cuz i dont have insurance,, cant make any money on me s00oo get rid of her That happened last month and im just now dealing with it..trying to replace a doctor isnt easy..especially when ya got no money and ya got RA,,
SO, i went to morton and thought this place is nice and the ppl are very compassonate,,that COUNTS alot!
i wrote a review on themsee here:
http://local.yahoo.com/details?id=18535010&rvwconf=1



IMUST be " pms'ing" becauseive really really been UPset about Benazir Bhutto assassinated after rally i cried for her,,,i thought she was so strong and brave for democracy-



news report :
RAWALPINDI, Pakistan - Pakistan opposition leader Benazir Bhutto was assassinated Thursday by an attacker who shot her after a campaign rally and then blew himself up. Her death stoked new chaos across the nuclear-armed nation, an important U.S. ally in the war on terrorism.

pics of our back yard

been awhile.. we lost POWER and heat and all from this ICE STORM ,,,including my harddrive lost it all
i reforamatted and installed all programs and stuff-,,and now here i am,,Back to cry and bitch
cuz im on my way to the welfare clinic now= scary -----and ill write when i come home

more pics of ice icebaby

I DO LOVE ELVIS PRESLEY - hes so damn pretty - when i pet him,,it helps the pain in my hands,,it makes me feel better-more at ease with all- comforted in a way,,,







click on pic to see his face better
I WENT TO MY "FACE2FACE INTERVIEW WITH dhs on tuesday dec 4th at 1.30= i made it in the nick oftime too- i had 2 drive like a crazy woman to make it there,,iwas LOOOKIN and LOOKIN andLOOKin,,, i knew theaddress444 south houston,,imgrerat downtown,,iloveit,,exceptall the construction ahs roadsleadingnowhere andclosed,,and all sorts of confusion down there...soooooo i finaly figured 444 MUST be the building that i'm familar with from along time ago i neededto go there-for business and there was NO ADDRESS ornosign saying dept of human services,,,anywhere..i did all kinds of illegal turns on Houston just because i wasnt gonna let me being lost stop me from finding my help i need so despairingly..(drama) ohboi,,soi made it and the girl who helpedme was so nice and i really was gald i went - now i know where it is YEAH! and guesswhat,,ofcourseiforgotthe most importantthing,,,i forgotmy damn driver's license of all things,,so that made todays apt extemnnd into wed to get conclusions! and i did get conclusions- withthe kind help from mary my rep...andthe nice ppl,at the food stamp place werevery helpful 2~! i was allowed foodstamps forawhile,,im so thankfull- maybe now i will gain weight

jennifers mom applied for SSDI and predicted,,i promise U that the reason they are giving debi a hard time about her medical records and wont give them to her is because they did not keep records,.,this is why they r making such a big deal ..as it turns out,,,shes right ,,looks likes hes been thru all this before. I cannot believe inadequate papers he kept on me,, and i thought he cared about me,,, foolish fooolish -seems noone cares about anyone anymore - i see "road rage" all the time now,, i see ppl unhappy as hell pushing grocery store carts up and down those isles..like robots..justweird.thats all.

RA IS SUCH A LIFE STEALER
arrow points 2 splitz-I cant seem to get a good photo of them-

i hate RA sofriggin much,,